Well life continues to chug along! Tim is working part time at Eastview and working as a substitute teacher part time. He actually doesn't mind it at all, and is wondering if teaching might be something he'll want to do someday. And he always comes home with the FUNNIEST stories about a high schooler who was trying to act tough, but really just made a fool of himself/herself, or an auto mechanics co-op class full of country boys that invite him to go crap shooting after school. :) So funny.

Jack is almost 3 and so uninterested in potty training that I'm wondering if he'll ever use the toilet in his whole life. At this point, it's not looking good. I realize that most kids don't start until after they're 3, but Jack is so smart that we had hoped it would be easier than this! But I try to remind myself that even though he IS so smart and has the vocabulary of an older child, he is still 2, so our expectations shouldn't be higher than they would be for the average 2 year old.... I'm just so tired of changing poopy diapers...

As for me, my counseling degree has been put on hold. It ended up being too much for me to handle at one time. I wish I could just take one class at a time, but you don't get loans for that option :( And we can't afford to pay for each class at this point in time. I'm fine taking some time off. Tim is still trying to decide if/when he wants to start taking classes again, and I want to hold off on making decisions about my own degree until he has settled into what he wants to do. I'm learning a lot about patience!

We still love our house, but as Jack gets bigger and wants to run around more and more, it has started feeling smaller and smaller. I've been dreaming of getting a house... and for now it will just remain a dream :) Someday it will happen!

I've been working lately on being content with what I have - not just content, but joyful! I so easily get stuck in ruts where I feel like everything is annoying or irritating and everyone is just so selfish and thinks only about themselves. Well... that would make ME all of those things, too, wouldn't it?!? I get so inside my own head and could stay there for days if I didn't make the conscious effort to try and think less about myself and focus on others. This sounds bad, doesn't it?? Well that's my struggle. I THINK too much. Life would be so much better if I could just quit thinking about stuff. Just invest in others - love on others, and life would be easier to take, I think. There I go... thinking again!

What happens when a 2 year old and his daddy get into a roll of tape...

Weekends!

So, long story short, Tim no longer works at State Farm. This has been both a relief and a struggle at the same time. Financially there is a pretty big gap between what he was making and what he is making now. Nonetheless we are able to pay all of our bills and still have enough to buy groceries, gas and diapers (hopefully not too much longer for these though!)

But - for the first time in our marriage - Tim doesn't have to work on the weekends anymore!!! I cannot even begin to tell you how exciting this is. I had an idea, but I didn't fully realize how much we were missing out on "us" time. We had pretty much become like ships passing in the night as far as us each needing to be at work at opposite times, so we'd pass off Jack duty to one or the other as we walked out the door for work or another evening activity. Rarely were all three of us at home at the same time for any longer than a night's sleep.

We are having a blast - we took Jack to the zoo today, and tomorrow we'll hang out some more! It is definitely worth having less income to have weekends all to ourselves now. God has always taken care of us, and He will continue to do so, but with the added bonus of more quality time together! Yay! Let the good times roll :)

Messy Us

Life has been really great lately. Tim has found his passion at seminary, studying apologetics and theology, and at work, as an associate junior high minister. I've been able to (barely, at times) stay afloat between work, school, and home life. Jack is the biggest joy of our lives. Even as a 2-year old, he manages to make us laugh our heads off every single day.

But while we are thriving, I have a confession to make. Our house is a MESS! It is the one part of our life that we simply can't keep up with. The main level gets cleaned the most, because that's where we spend the most time, but our bedrooms and the basement sit completely trashed 24/7. We moved into our new home vowing to keep it nice and treat it as the blessing that it is, but so far we have failed miserably.

I'm having trouble deciding if this is something that I should be concerned about. One of my counseling professors talked with me and my in-class client once about my client's huge amount of stress over working full-time, being a mom to a 5-year old, and trying to do all of the housework, thanks to her deadbeat husband (in her opinion). My professor's take on it was, what's the worst that could happen if you just accept a messy house? If it lowers your stress level to minimize the cleaning and housework, then why not just let it be? Worse things could happen than having a messy house. I liked that.

It worked for me for awhile, trying to convince myself that it's okay to just leave my home a wreck. As long as it doesn't become unhealthy or anything gross like that, I had to remind myself each morning as I stepped over toys and sippy cups and old mail, then it's okay to just let it go and worry about it when I have the time and motivation. But the fact that I had to try and convince myself of this daily convinced me of something else: I am definitely NOT okay with a messy house. I certainly don't require perfection, but I can't live in a mess. I just can't - the mess stresses me out almost as much as trying to keep up with cleaning it.

So, my last few weeks have been trying keep up and clean whenever I have a chance, even if it's just a few small messes at a time. I'm still really bad at keeping up with the laundry in our bedrooms, but I have managed to have small victories, like making the bed every day (for the first time in YEARS!), and keeping the three of us in clean clothes, even if that means washing three outfits the night before we need them. I've also been running the dishwasher more often, even when it's not completely full. (I am all about efficiency, so I have a hard time running it when it's not completely stuffed full of dirty dishes. But, if it means taking dirty dishes off of the tables and counters and getting them clean, I will do it now. Otherwise they'll sit in there for a long time.)

I'm trying to do better. I think I missed the memo about how to be a good cleaner, or about why I should be motivated to clean my house. I absolutely hate taking the time to clean. If I have a rare free moment, I want to plant my booty on the couch and relax on facebook or watch my DVR'ed reality shows. But I guess if I hate the mess, I should do something about it. It's kind of the same thing that I've always thought about if I hate feeling fat, I should do something about that too instead of just complaining about it.

So anyway, if you come to my house and you notice I haven't swept the floor or dusted any piece of furniture in what looks like a long time, I probably haven't. But I'm working on it. I do want to take pride in my home, I really do. I just... am working on it :)